Do you worry about how saying no to your boss, clients, or family might be interpreted? Worried they might be disappointed? Angry? Horrified? Frustrated? I hear you.
Fear of their response often traps a lot of us.
(Especially for my beloved people pleasers; I know how much you REALLY hate even thinking about disappointing people.)
But do we give enough airtime to the flip side?
There are some major perks when people know you will say no freely.
In fact, you know what I think the best part of being on a team or in a family with people who know the power of NO?
- When they are a yes, you know it’s authentic. When they are a yes, they are usually a hell yes and all in.
- When they are a no and there are good boundaries and mutual respect, you can often work together to find who is right for the job/task… None of the martyrdom, guilt-driven crap.
- When people are playing big— when they are up to great things, they’ll use their time and energy on those things, and they’ll use their no’s to safeguard their time and energy for their top priorities.
- They’ll also know what helps give them balance, knowing that and what they need to take care of themselves… so they can keep working on big bold dreams.
Let’s be honest, it also kind of sucks to make a request of someone and find out that they really regret or resent it.
So this is an invitation to test it out for yourself: can the initial discomfort that comes with the possibility of disappointing people with a ‘NO’ be offset by your authentic ‘YES’ moments?
Bonus: With every authentic no– you get to grow in the direction you want and keep working on those big bold dreams…
P.S. A few weeks ago, I mentioned a little grid looking at authentic Yes/ No’s for incoming requests. Check it out here if you missed it.
